I’ve been home for a week, to attend the wedding of one of my best friends. Things are well.
A couple of pictures of Wabanong:
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I fasted for three days, and after being nearly alone for most of that time, I got pretty crazy. Bored, mostly; bored out of my skull, and not sure of what I’m doing, what to do with myself. I broke my fast yesterday evening, and told myself that I was going to town the next day to distract myself with food and news. Which I’m now doing, but not before I received a dream last night.
I don’t know if I should share the dream, for fear that it would lose power by the sharing, so I won’t. But it woke me in the middle of the night and made me terrified for the future and reminded me that I was alive but close to death, the way everyone and everything is alive and close to death. And the dream reoriented me to a greater purpose — whether it’s one that’s literal or figurative, or both, I’m not sure.
Now, in daylight, in memory, I can’t quite bring back the power that the dream had on me in the dead of night, and I’m not at all clear on where I should take it. But it meant something, because it came at the end of a three-day fast, when I needed it most; and it was powerful enough to keep me awake for the rest of the morning, so that I only got three and a half hours of sleep. Crazy.
But it doesn’t quite solve the boredom problem, I think. “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it,” said Einstein. Read the full post
I’ve realized that I have scant interest in primitive lifeways.
Two weeks ago, after a stressful week of bugs and humidity, I hoped to escape it all by fleeing to California for Stanford’s commencement weekend. I thought I’d get some sun, relaxation, food, and good times with family and old friends. I did get some food, but I ended up getting stressed out by an overly ambitious schedule with too little time to myself. And when I returned to camp, I discovered that we were about to go on an overnight birch bark gathering trip — more work for me.
Basically, I crashed. After a day of that, I opted out, took a ride back to the house, relaxed for a couple of days. I went back out to camp, but I was still low on energy, depressed, irritable, insufferable.
I’m still recovering. Read the full post
