The Great Mystery shimmers at the borders of my awareness.

I find that the consciousness associated with dealing with the tasks of normal, everyday life occupies a very narrow range of vibration, like just a tiny, 2 MHz turn of the dial on an FM radio tuner. And it’s pretty full of static, at that. There are lots of different things coming in all the time, songs cut in and out, news cuts in and out, sometimes it comes in clear and other times there’s nothing but static.

On those rare occasions when I have a more extended period of time to set aside my daily worries, I can glimpse what’s beyond that narrow band of consciousness. But a number of problems crop up. First of all, it sometimes seems threatening to move away from the familiar frequency I’m tuned into, because all of my problems are waiting to be solved there. And second, actually tuning into a richer state of consciousness is like tuning in to frequency that’s actually clear and loud. If I allowed myself to go there, it could be powerful.

I can begin to glimpse what it means to go into mystical ecstasy. It’s a bit frightening.

So those are the twin restrictions that I face: One is a reluctance to move away from, the other a reluctance to move toward.

I would not really have to face this at all, except that my growth demands it. Really. It’s like having a sixth sense begin to awaken, and it may be delayed, it may be distracted, but it will not be denied. And even if I spend a week or a month ignoring it and pretending it doesn’t exist, sometimes all of a sudden it makes itself known and then there’s hell to pay.

I’d rather the process be more gentle, and conscious. Besides which, what it offers is an opening to a realm that is full of richness and power, right in the here and now. It’s a spiritual Holy Grail, of sorts. How can I deny that?

So, what ends up happening is that I force myself into that unnatural, narrow, staticky frequency for long periods of time in order to deal with the daily rhythms of civilized living, while my senses scream to be allowed their freedom to expand. Unfortunately, civilized living takes up a lot of time and energy, and by the end of the day I’ve spent so much time there that I’m too damn exhausted to explore wonders. I just want to zone out and get some sleep. So often all this sensitivity ends up doing is causing me pain in the midst of my life.

Quite a conundrum.

But I think that all my explorations about learning to live in the world are not just about learning to live in the civilized world; it all applies to living in the whole, multidimensional world. What riches does this world have to offer? I need to slowly, safely, carefully explore it, in little bits. I need to take little breaks to enjoy myself, and stop forcing myself to stay in that tight band of constant concern.

Let the Great Mystery be sampled, in bite-sized pieces.