Summer 2000

Wilderness Guide Program, 2001

This step in my growth was an attempt to break out of old patterns, away from the homebound, inwardly-focused, intellectual boundaries with which I was most comfortable. I consider my time at Teaching Drum Outdoor School to mark a sort of coming-of-age in many ways.

It was both tremendously positive and very negative. It was there that I began to take responsibility for my life in a more intimate fashion, and because I gained a lot of knowledge, awareness, and skills there. I made some good friends, and learned a lot simply from living in close contact with an ever-changing, living environment. And, I learned a lot through the adjustments that my mind and body underwent during the process of trying to live a more primitive lifestyle.

But, as I saw the experience as a challenge to the person I was, I ended up rejecting a large part of my own inner experience, and so suffered a great deal for it. For instance, the fact that I had scant interest in craft-making came to be at odds with the strong craft-making focus of the program, and the force I exerted on myself to do such things, without seeking to understand the root of my feelings, was violence against my nature. Since then, I’ve learned more to accept and respect who I am, to be more balanced in my approach to growth, and to seek awareness and understanding before action.

Nonetheless, the yearlong was a seminal experience in my life and I have gained profound insight into myself by experiencing it. I’m glad that I did it.

At any rate, here is a photographic chronicle of my experiences. I spent three months there during the summer between my junior and senior years in college, and then went back for a full year after graduating early. I kept an ongoing journal of my year.